No More Twitter, also no more big commissions

★Current Mood: 💭Thoughtful
★Listening to: Alone in my room- Fall away
★Watching: pool rooms break down video
★Reading: Fanfiction

★Playing: Duck game
★Eating:  scallion pancakes 

★Drinking: Foco sugar cane drink
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Ehhhhh I think I stuck out the site long enough but time to go with my art.

A few reasons for this, I can't keep up with websites like I used to, and I seem to be trimming down my sites as the months go on.

-Engagement is no good and I refuse to pay for a blue checkmark. However, engagement is pretty good on places like Instagram and Tumblr for me. Plus I use those other sites with my local art community. The engagement part isn't anyone but Elons and his algorithm for his profit's fault and tbh... I can't keep up and don't want to anymore. It's exhausting to be an artist plus do that. Also as I get older I just outgrew some sites. My twitter will still be up, but 100% locked and I won't be accepting anyone to it. Feel free to unfollow or keep it followed to keep my art as an archive.

- Gore/death videos.... now this is a huge reason I barely interact or get on twitter anymore. I'm sorry but this is just ridiculous that this is the content the for you pages push no matter how much I block them. The site personally isn't good for my mental health if that's what is gonna be popping up every time I open the app just to post funny furry dog face images. It's just not worth ruining my day at all.

Places you can find me

My website

My website has everything you need personally while my Tumblr/Instagram is where I communicate with my community.

Tumblr

Instagram

Now on to something bigger. I will be finishing my queue and no longer taking big commissions. Yes no more big rendered portraits rendered sketch pages  NADAH. Can you still get a commission from me? Sure and only from my discord. There will still be a discount dailys though, but nothing huge. I am pretty much tired and want to indulge in my work for me : D And to finally do gift art and art trades again. You know fun stuff.

Anyway I do appreciate the support for years on the twittwats and  Love yall 

see yall elsewhere.

 

A lil bit tired ( art development) + More

★Current Mood: 😓Tired
★Listening to: Purgatorial - Harvesting Nightmares

★Watching: Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant

★Reading: Fanfiction

★Playing: Shinsetsu Samurai Spirits: Bushidou Retsuden
★Eating:  Homemade chicken and broccoli

★Drinking: Cola
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Well so much for my journal site rn. Bear with me......
I used to use Discord to host my graphics buuuuuuuuuuuuuuut lesson learned. Idk why I did that... it just seemed easier but tbh I will be hosting it all on this site. So none of it can end up janked tf up. This is more so annoying because I  had plans this weekend and it didn't involve fixing my journal. My bio is fixed and saved as best as it could of been. May actually add more to it. Just so annoyed about it. But now I gotta fix icons and such for each entry.... so fuck it I guess cause I don't remember each one I used. LESSON LEARNED FR.

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ARTY ARTY

Anyway I got my art into South Street Art Mart and I am so happy. I'm already making sales and I'm impressed at the fact that folks locally like my art.  Ahhh I'm pleased about this.

I will say, I have been doodling but mostly doing some self-searching with my art and I'm well ....growing that's for sure. Here are some commissions and 2 gift arts I've done while trying to get back in the groove of things. I am going through a growing pain stage with my art which is good I am advancing ..bad because it's frustrating the shit out of me...

Now there are 7 so far

 

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 PARTY HARDY

Also, I have just been busy and continue to be. Had a 3-day weekend of concerts which you can view in Party Cat pg.2/pg.3.

Partying non-stop is intense but staying in the house is a bit much for me as of late. The partying doesn't end there I went to a goth event with DJ Kulture Shock who is back in town aaaaaand Lords of Acid/Rob zombie concert in May/sept. Funny enough the one time I said I was not a fan of Mike Sega as a local DJ, he came up with bangers on the dance floor....at the after-party at the KMFDM concert. But we could not stay..we were tired and wanted to go to our respective homes.

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Personal life

So I want 2-3 jobs and it kinda sucks that the market is such ass rn. I get a ton of calls for nice paying jobs but they don't seem to realize I don't have a car and also even if I did I'm not driving for almost 2 hours just for a job, that's insane.  Oh well the hunt carries on. Other than that life has been life-ing. 

I have been a bit burnt out and depressed not with anything at all in particular just out of it. eh this happens but first in a long time talking openly about it. I think once I get a job I won't have time to focus on that so here is hoping I get one fast.

Operation 3 day concert weekend Is a Go Go!

★Current Mood:  👀 Excited

★Listening to: DRP – Electro Brain 586 (Full Album - 1990)
★Watching: Hollow Man (2000)
★Reading: Fanfiction

★Playing: Shadow Corridor
★Eating: Salmon sushi

★Drinking: Jasmine milk tea
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Slayher metal drag race 2/22/2023

Shrek Rave 2/23/2023

Dorian Electra 3/8/2023

Kim Dracula 3/92023

KMFDM 3/10/2023

Mmmmm yes Im so excited about this, a 3 day weekend with my homie Rudrakitty and it's just concerts back to back. I should be semi-healed by then honestly. Since my next appointment to get my ace wraps off is on the 20th. I'm so cabin fever that I got tickets for me and Ru to go to a metal drag race show and a Shrek rave. Im going to a Shrek rave with Rudra on the 23rd. WE ARE GETTING TO THESE MFIN CONCERTS AND EVENTS. There is another secret event, 2 more I won't talk about until after I go ^.^ So this year is exciting and overly booked. And possibly more booked as time goes on. I'm just tired of sitting in the house and while I like goth parties Im beyond selective with my DJ and who I support and enjoy.

Yesterday I got my hair straightened cause eh...I just don't have the time to comb my hair while healing from surgery every day. So straightening it is the only way rn. Im trying to enjoy my hair straightened even tho I feel odd with it, but I have to admit to myself that I do not have the energy to do hair care 24/7 and that's what hair stylists are for and why we pay them. It took forever to get my hair appointment by the same stylist I went to originally. She is appointment only and it's like maaaan.... I have to book her a week in advance I was lucky she had something before this art jam I hosted yesterday.

I am also going to start the 100-day sketch challenge..unsure if that thing actually helps with art but I'm going to try honestly. I don't think it should be timed like everyone is doing but I do want to attempt it to get better at art and also to mentally kick myself to draw more. With more pieces, I can enjoy. this will also help me finish a sketchbook project I'm attempting this year. I have only finished one semi-digital sketchbook but not a physical one. So that's something to look forward to. 

ART JAM PHOTOS ( PD:2/14/2024)

All I was able to do was a scribble cause I got tipsy and full on food weh
 just pen and highlighter woooo

On a positive note, I got into South Street Art Mart and I am now one of their artists. I am excited to finally be in a brick-and-mortar store selling my work. Still actually waiting on them to put my section of the site up with my work so folks can buy from me... it takes some time. 

Happy New years!! woop woop. NOW LETS PARTY!

★Current Mood: 💘 Loved
★Listening to: Disturbed- Conflict
★Watching: Death becomes her & Kill all neighbors 
★Reading: Fanfiction

★Playing: High on life
★Eating:  Congee with all the fixins

★Drinking: Foco sugar cane drink
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I haven't updated here since pre-Christmas, and to be mad honest.. I have been way too damn busy. It has been busy since last August and is still very busy but I think it will slow down after my top surgery this month, where I will be forced to chill out before I have to go back to work again.

But the year ended great and the start of my year started so positive and lovely. Not to mention I just feel so confident and sure of myself this year. There could be so many factors as to why but eh I won't focus too much on it so I can enjoy this feeling. So let's start with the basics

Life has been great like I said prior I have had a ball since last year after getting married. My life is so different in the most positive way. I have had tons of successful cons as well. Overall I'm just felt myself after I started to transition on T. Me and my husband have just been busy be it doing our own things or just spending a ton of time together bonding. Wish we could bond more but I have been so busy, but no worries I'm gonna force more us time out of myself. He  is feeling a lil lonely is all  but I'll fix that. We still haven't gotten our rings but that's more on me since I told him that's not important right now vs the things we need to get done. Like, get a car... and get a bigger living place for us and my daughter. We want three separate rooms since well we just prefer it that way. Even more so as an artist needing my own focus and also working from home with my non-art job..... Like I said busy. This a 2-year plan tho to move into a house which is nice since we have some affordable areas picked out with nice schools too. So much saving and moving forward. We are already halfway there for that though.

My mental health is much better after realizing a lot has been done to me irl with my mother. Acknowledging it makes mental recovery much better vs going "it is what it is" type of mentality. My psychiatrist is a gem as well and is LGBTQA+ friendly but I only found out once I came out to her. She was very happy to see my mental health take a big swing into the positives compared to last year when I got her.  I really love having a support system in this manner with trusted doctors. Which is very rare for me. But mental health is also on point now that Im out of a shit household Im not told not to take meds or anything like that, so I'm actually safe and happy mentally for once in my goddamn life for the past 2 years.

Now for the biggums... my surgery date is Jan 25th for top. I am beyond blessed to have my insurance completely cover it and I'll be going to Dr. Kathy Rumer for it. I can't take T for 2 weeks prior and 3 weeks after to avoid blood clotting during my healing. I also can no longer smoke until I heal weh. Since nic will make healing horrible for me.  But over all Im so happy rn. After this, it's just the trans journey moving forward.

I'm thinking of making a post here with photos of my healing process and surgery as a reference for other trans folks of course with a CW tag and warning so folks have a reference if they ever wanted top surgery along with my doctor's name website and address that is all public anyway as well as my insurance so you guys can get it for free too.

I'll be sure to add pics of what T is doing to my beard and a video of my voice too since it's been some time.

Also last pic of me b4 surgery.

all 3 from various events both goth dance and alternative life drawing

Art has been progressing. though I have been way too busy party or getting ready for doctor appointments I am forcing time in to draw while managing my social life. It is proving to just be insanely busy. Im not sure what direction my work is going atm but I am going with the flow and not fighting what every creative juice is flowing >.>; . I have too much art I'm not showing yet but Im gonna take my time.

Here are some pieces I've been working on on and off until they are finished 

( click on images to make them bigger)

 

As for my music, I am working on an EP Called Narci Prey EP that will be free for folks to download and listen to. It is a very personal project if not vent but also all fun so don't take me too seriously when it comes to the lyrics. It's all industrial EBM with a dash of goth lovins. When it's done you can always find the music here on my page

You can listen to a sample of G3t-G0t and Self inflicted below

Welp thats it for now it's gonna be a very busy next 2 weeks ;w;///

Laterrrrrzzzzz <3